I just wanted to remind you that you are amazing.
I don’t think we get to hear that as much as we need it, and sometimes we are just too tired to give it to ourselves, so I’m sharing that compassion with you.
We don’t always know how to tell people how we feel about them; it’s like this great big mystery to find out how people think about us.
Looking at it from a cultural lens, Caribbean families, for example, you’ll often overhear your parents telling your auntie or their friend how proud they are of you that you excelled in school, won the trophy, involved in sports, working on your business, yet, they may not directly tell you how proud they are of you. Sometimes, we even forget to tell ourselves, but at this moment, I am showing up to let you know that you are doing a wonderful job, and I am so proud of your thoughtfulness and efforts.
Find That Positive Encouragement
We have to find supportive spaces to pour into us, especially when you are in a service position, or typically engage in a love language of giving. Get around a community working just as hard as you are, especially as entrepreneurs and women with amazing goals. We aren’t always around people that get the drive or the sacrifice that comes with this role. Or even how empty, or worn out you are on the inside, despite how aesthetically pleasing you may show up on the outside. Find a tribe that gets that, and that’s willing to pour into you as well. You are welcome to join my tribe, especially if you are a woman of color, we sometimes need a unique space to relax, feel safe and allow ourselves to be poured into.
Find the community that is going to push you
That said, just because someone doesn’t see or acknowledge your brilliance doesn’t mean that you aren’t exactly that. It’s ok to pour into yourself instead of waiting for external validation and approval. I want you to think of two ways to remind yourself that you are amazing, that you are brilliant, creative, [insert strength].
Think about that right now, write it down, and take the next step of figuring out how to remind yourself of even that reminder. For example, I could send myself a text message, so let me find that app that will do that for me. I can schedule a few emails for the future, etc. By engaging in that extra bit of action right now, this shifts from interesting thoughts to a sustainable system of action that regularly infuses positive encouragement into your life.
What’s the key to pushing through? You have to stay mentally and emotionally encouraged. One way to do this is to reinforce statements that uplift your spirit on a daily basis.
- I am happy with my growth at this moment.
- I am in love with my life and my business. I own my worth.
- I deserve the best in all areas of my life
- I embrace the greatness within me
- I am unstoppable
- I am a fierce and powerful woman
- I am energized and ready to slay the day
- I welcome positive vibes and opportunity into my life
- It is ok to rest
- I make self-care a priority because it’s essential for self-love
And this final gem from Congress woman Maxine Waters, “I am a strong black woman and I cannot be intimidated.”
Amanda Fludd, LCSW-R is a Psychotherapist, Coach and Consultant pushing the personal development of women. She loves to run, nap and spend time with her family. Amanda talks tips and all things mental health at www.amandafludd.com. Make sure to also follow her on Instagram @amanda.fludd.