Category: Therapy

Thoughtful Black woman sitting in a bright, naturally lit room with a light gray couch and greenery. Text reads, “You’re Hitting Those Vision Board Goals. But Is Your Healing Keeping Up?” highlighting the importance of emotional healing, mental wellness, and self-care alongside personal and professional success.

Anxiety Confidence EMDR Therapy Self Care Therapy Trauma Women empowerment Anxiety • EMDR intensive • EMDR Therapy • high-achieving women • Long Island therapist • self-doubt • trauma therapy November 3, 2026 By AMANDA FLUDD 0 Comments

You’re Hitting Those Vision Board Goals. But Is Your Healing Keeping Up?

The life you’re building deserves a version of you who feels as good as she looks on paper.

There’s something about watching a woman step into her own. She’s making moves, opening doors, taking chances on herself, and finally seeing some of those vision board goals become her actual life.

And I love that for her.

But I’ve also been thinking about the parts of ourselves that don’t always keep up with the lives we’re building.

You can be a powerhouse in your own right. The person who handles things, leads the team, builds the business, figures out the next move. You know how to get things done.

But you also know when something in your gut doesn’t feel safe.

When your confidence disappears in a particular room. When someone’s words stay with you longer than they should. When you find yourself questioning a decision you were perfectly comfortable with yesterday.

And then there’s the stuff you don’t even talk about.

The deep doubts. The trauma you haven’t found the words for. The relationship you never fully processed. The things that hurt so much you’ve learned to live around them instead of addressing them.

I’m not even talking about the things you can clearly see. I’m talking about the stuff in that back closet.

You know the quiet things I’m talking about. I see you.

The place where you’ve tucked away everything you didn’t have the time, energy, or emotional capacity to deal with. You closed the door, straightened yourself up, and went right back to being the woman everyone knows you to be.

And for a while, that works, until one day, something happens.

A comment. A disappointment. An unexpected loss. A relationship that brings up something familiar. Maybe even an incredible opportunity that suddenly has you questioning whether you’re good enough.

And that one thing sets off a flood of emotions you thought you had under control.

They weren’t resolved. They were just sitting in the closet.

Being Busy Can Become a Convenient Reason Not to Heal

I know how much you have going on. And I know that finding time for yourself isn’t always as simple as moving a few things around on your calendar.

But I also think we have to be willing to ask ourselves some uncomfortable questions.

How long have you been telling yourself you’ll get to your healing when things slow down?

How many times have you said I’m good, because explaining what you’re really feeling would require a conversation you don’t have the energy for?

And how much of what you’ve been calling ambition is actually pressure you’ve carried so long you don’t know how to put it down?

Because there’s a difference between being driven and being driven by fear.

There’s a difference between wanting to do excellent work and feeling like one mistake will prove you’re not good enough.

There’s a difference between being responsible and believing everything will fall apart if you stop holding it together.

And there’s a difference between choosing to move forward and staying in motion because slowing down would mean feeling something you’ve been avoiding.

Avoidance is not a cure.

It may have helped you get through a difficult season. It may even have been necessary at the time. But that doesn’t mean it has to remain your way of coping.

Sometimes being busy is about having a full life. Other times, it gives us a very convincing reason not to open that closet.

The problem is that we don’t always get to decide when something inside it comes spilling out.

You’re Doing Amazing Things. But How Do You Actually Feel About Yourself?

In my work as a trauma therapist, I spend a lot of time with highly driven women who are doing amazing things. Women with careers, businesses, families, big ideas, and responsibilities that matter.

One thing I’ve noticed is that how they show up for the world isn’t always how they feel about themselves.

Someone else may see a confident leader, while inside she’s questioning every decision.

She can negotiate a contract, manage a team, and handle difficult conversations at work. But when it comes to setting a boundary in her personal life, suddenly she’s wondering if she’s asking for too much.

She knows she’s qualified for the opportunity, but her body responds as though she’s about to be exposed.

And sometimes that’s the hardest part to explain.

Because intellectually, you know better.

You know you’ve earned your place. You know that relationship wasn’t healthy. You know one person’s opinion doesn’t define you.

But knowing something and feeling safe enough to believe it are not always the same thing.

That’s why I love the deeper work we do in trauma therapy.

As an EMDR-trained therapist, one thing I appreciate about this approach is that we can go beyond talking about these patterns and start addressing the experiences and beliefs connected to them.

We can get curious about where that I’m not enough belief came from. Why your body reacts so strongly to certain situations. Why an experience from years ago can still shape how you feel about yourself today.

Not everything we work through has to be a major traumatic event, either. Sometimes it’s anxiety, persistent self-doubt, a painful relationship, an experience of rejection, or a belief about yourself that has followed you into every new chapter.

Those experiences may be part of your story. They don’t have to keep shaping every decision you make.

What If Relief Didn’t Have to Take So Much From You?

I think one of the things that keeps women from seeking therapy is the idea that healing is going to require so much from them.

More time. More emotional energy. Another standing appointment. Another responsibility added to an already full calendar.

And listen, healing does require something of us. I’m not going to pretend otherwise.

But it doesn’t always have to look the way you’ve imagined.

Sometimes it’s less about finding endless amounts of time and more about being intentional with the time you decide to give yourself.

Part of my work as a trauma therapist is curating healing experiences that make sense for the person sitting in front of me. That includes understanding your goals, what you’ve been carrying, how ready you feel to address it, and what kind of support will help you move through the process.

It’s also why I offer EMDR and trauma intensives as part of my practice.

An intensive gives us a dedicated block of therapeutic time instead of relying only on weekly sessions.

And I know how much you value your time.

Maybe taking an hour out of your workweek every Tuesday feels impossible right now. Maybe you’ve started therapy before but struggled to keep the momentum going between appointments. Or maybe you’re carrying something specific, and you’re finally ready to give it your attention.

An intensive creates space for us to do just that.

And it doesn’t have to be about what you’d traditionally call trauma. We may be addressing anxiety, self-doubt, a painful experience, or that not enough belief that keeps showing up no matter how much you accomplish.

Have You Ever Considered an EMDR Intensive?

Here’s what I especially love about this approach.

We don’t have to spend every session getting back into the work, only to wrap up just as we’re getting somewhere meaningful.

With an intensive, we have more continuous time to explore what comes up, work through distressing experiences, and notice the shifts happening along the way.

Depending on your needs, that might look like a few 90-minute sessions.

Or my personal favorite: a Saturday morning where we set aside three to six hours for focused therapeutic work.

For some people, that uninterrupted time can create meaningful progress that might otherwise be spread across several months of weekly appointments. Of course, that varies from person to person, and an intensive doesn’t guarantee faster results.

We also don’t jump straight into processing without preparation. We take time to make sure you feel grounded, supported, and ready for the experience.

I recently added sound healing to my practice as another way to support relaxation and create a more intentional therapeutic experience when appropriate. I’m excited about what that can add to the work.

Because I want healing to feel like something you’re choosing for yourself, not another obligation you’re trying to squeeze into your life.

It’s dedicated time to address what you’ve been carrying.

Time to be supported.

Time to consider what might become possible when you aren’t responding to everything through the lens of something that hurt you years ago.

But How Do You Know If EMDR Is Actually Working?

This is one of the questions I get most, and it’s a good one.

Because EMDR doesn’t always feel like what we expect therapy to feel like.

Sometimes memories come up in pieces. Sometimes you notice sensations in your body. Sometimes your mind makes connections you weren’t expecting.

And sometimes you leave a session wondering whether anything happened at all.

In a recent video, I talk about this very question after an EMDR experience where the person wasn’t sure at first that the session had worked. But as we explored what she noticed afterward, she began to recognize that her relationship with something that used to cause her significant anxiety had changed.

That matters.

Because healing isn’t always about some dramatic emotional breakthrough.

Sometimes it’s realizing you can approach a situation without the same dread.

That you can remember something painful without feeling like you’re reliving it.

That the thing that once made you question yourself doesn’t have quite the same hold on you anymore.

I also share my own experience with EMDR and how it changed my emotional response to a car accident I’d been carrying for years.

The memory didn’t disappear.

My relationship with it changed.

And sometimes that’s what creates room for us to move forward differently.

Watch: What Does EMDR Feel Like When It’s Working?

In this video, I break down what EMDR can feel like, how to recognize progress, why the changes aren’t always obvious at first, and what makes intensive sessions different from traditional weekly therapy.

You Are Worth the Time

Here’s what I want to leave you with.

I’m not asking you to stop pursuing your goals, slow down your ambition, or make your life smaller.

Please, keep going after the things you want.

But as you update that vision board, make those investments, and plan your next chapter, I want you to think about the woman who gets to experience all of it. Not just what she’s accomplishing, but how she’s feeling. How she’s showing up in her relationships. Whether she trusts herself. Whether she can enjoy what she’s created without constantly bracing for something to go wrong.

And whether there are still parts of her that need some attention.

You are worth the time it takes to explore those parts.

You’re worth investing in an experience that is just for you.

And you’re worth finding out what a more healed version of you might feel like as you move through this world.

You don’t have to wait for the closet door to burst open before you decide to look at what’s inside.

If you’ve been putting your healing aside, maybe this is your invitation to reconsider what making time for yourself could look like.

And if an EMDR intensive sounds like something you’d like to explore, I’d love to help you figure out whether it’s the right fit.

Explore EMDR Intensives at Kensho Psychotherapy Services →

Reads You Might Like

Trauma & Anxiety Therapy for the Strong Ones
For the woman who’s always been the dependable one but carries more emotionally than people realize.
Girl, How Long Are We Going to Keep Talking About the Same Thing
What Is an EMDR Intensive? How It May Help With Anxiety
The practical follow-up if you’re curious about EMDR and whether an intensive might fit your life.

Amanda Fludd, LCSW-R, is a trauma therapist and Executive Director of Kensho Psychotherapy Services in Lynbrook, New York. She specializes in EMDR therapy and offers focused therapy intensives for adults ready to address the experiences, beliefs, and emotional patterns that may be holding them back.

Podcast — Grace, Growth & Business: https://gracegrowthandbusiness.buzzsprout.com · EMDR Intensives: https://amandafludd.com/therapyintensive/ · Contact: amanda@amandafludd.com · amandafludd.com/individual-therapy

emotion regulation for black women image. black woman looking worried and looking outside her car

Mental Health Self-Care & Mental Health Therapy anger management • coping skills • emotional regulation • how to regulate emotions • Long Island therapy • Lynbrook therapist • managing emotions • therapy for emotional regulation September 22, 2026 By AMANDA FLUDD 0 Comments

What Is Emotional Regulation? Skills and Therapy Support

Have you ever had an emotion go from 0 to 100 before you had time to figure out what was happening? Maybe you got angry and said something you didn’t mean, shut down during a difficult conversation, or felt so overwhelmed you just wanted to get away from the situation.

We all experience anger, sadness, anxiety, frustration, and other difficult emotions. The challenge isn’t having these emotions. It’s knowing what to do when they show up.

We aren’t born knowing how to manage our emotions. We learn these skills through modeling, instruction, experience, and practice. Without those skills, emotions can feel like they take over quickly, leading us to react in ways that may create more stress, affect our relationships, or leave us wishing we had handled the situation differently.

That’s where emotional regulation comes in.

So, What Is Emotional Regulation?

Simply put, emotional regulation means managing your feelings and responding in ways that are more helpful than harmful.

When emotions like anger, sadness, or anxiety show up, emotional regulation is knowing what to do with them. It can look like noticing what you’re feeling, giving yourself time and space to process it, and choosing how you want to respond.

That space can be the hardest part.

Let’s say you’re in a big argument with one of your closest friends. Your anger or frustration can go from 0 to 100 pretty quickly, and you may feel it in your body. Your energy starts rising. Your voice gets louder or even cracks a little. Your muscles tense. Maybe you cry when you’re upset. Your instinct might be to leave the situation, shut down, or react immediately.

All of this can happen fast.

Before you’ve had time to process what you’re feeling, you may say something you regret or respond in a way you didn’t intend.

When we don’t have the skills to slow that process down, our emotions can hit us hard and quickly get overwhelming. We may react in ways that aren’t helpful or aren’t consistent with what we actually want.

Learning to manage emotions doesn’t mean you won’t get angry with that friend, lose your cool, or struggle to shake off heavy feelings. It means building the ability to notice what’s happening, create space, and decide what you want to do next in that experience.

What Does Managing Your Emotions Actually Look Like?

If something makes me feel better, does that mean it’s helping me manage my emotions?

Not necessarily.

Everyone has different ways of dealing with difficult emotions. Some strategies help us create enough space to process what we’re feeling and respond more intentionally. Others give us short-term relief but create more problems later. They may feel like they’re helping us manage the emotion when we’re actually avoiding it.

When Coping Brings Relief but Creates More Problems

Some strategies may reduce emotional discomfort in the moment but aren’t useful to us over time. This might look like:

Using alcohol or other substances to numb what you’re feeling
Self-harm as a way to cope with overwhelming emotions
Withdrawing from difficult situations or immediately cutting people off rather than addressing what happened
Escalating to verbal or physical aggression
Spending hours scrolling or doomscrolling on social media to avoid what you’re feeling while other responsibilities get neglected

These behaviors can create temporary distance from the emotion, but they don’t necessarily help us understand or work through what’s happening.

Healthier Ways to Make Space for Your Emotions

More useful strategies give an emotion’s intensity space to come down. As the intensity decreases, you can better understand what you’re feeling and choose how you want to respond. Who doesn’t want that?

This might mean walking away from a heated conversation and returning when you’re calmer. It could mean getting adequate sleep so you’re less vulnerable to feeling overwhelmed or easily triggered. You might notice the thoughts that show up when you’re upset and write them down in a journal instead of reacting immediately. When you review those thoughts, you may realize they don’t represent what you actually feel or want.

Breathing exercises or meditation can also help you slow down and notice what is happening in your body. Check out this quick 90 second breath reset to help bring down reactions. And sometimes, you may need to bring what you’re noticing into therapy, where you have more space to understand the patterns underneath your reactions.

The goal isn’t to get rid of your emotions. It’s to experience them better without letting the intensity of the moment decide what happens next.

How Can Therapy Help You Manage Your Emotions?

Therapy can help you develop emotional regulation skills so you can make healthier decisions, communicate more effectively, and feel more connected in your relationships.

Many therapeutic approaches can support this work. One is Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). CBT can help you understand the connection between your thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. You can begin to recognize what triggers strong emotional reactions, notice the thoughts that come up in those moments, and practice different ways of responding.

At Kensho Psychotherapy Services, our therapists use evidence-based approaches to help you better understand their emotional patterns and build skills for managing difficult emotions.

If your emotions regularly feel like they’re “too much,” you’ve been told you’re “too sensitive,” or it feels like your emotions control you instead of the other way around, you can learn skills to change how you show up in your life. If you’re looking for support, it might be time to book a therapy appointment and have a safe space to better understand your emotional patterns and practice new ways of responding. Are you ready? Because we are ready to support you.

Learning these skills doesn’t mean you never feel angry, anxious, sad, disappointed, or overwhelmed. It means getting better at understanding what you’re feeling, making space for it, and deciding what you want to do next. That is powerful.

Article written by Intern Illiana Townsend, with support from Amanda Fludd, LCSW-R

Kensho Psychotherapy Services provides psychotherapy in Lynbrook, Nassau County, and online throughout New York.

EMDR Intensives:
Talking about it isn’t enough? If you want deeper relief, learn about EMDR Intensives at Kensho.

Struggling with overthinking? Watch my YouTube videos on quieting racing thoughts. Let us know what you find helpful.

Anxiety Therapy Anxiety • anxiety relief • anxiety therapy • coping skills • Mental Health • New York therapist • radical acceptance • self-compassion • Therapy July 30, 2026 By AMANDA FLUDD 0 Comments

Fighting Your Anxiety Can Make It Feel Worse— What to Try Instead.

Dealing with anxiety can be incredibly frustrating and feel like a major inconvenience in your life. It’s normal to find yourself thinking, “Why can’t I just relax?” or “Why can’t I stop being this way and just be normal?”

When we’re overwhelmed by anxiety, our knee-jerk reaction is often to become angry, frustrated, ashamed, or critical of ourselves for feeling that way. We start ruminating over what’s “wrong” with us, fearing our reactions, or wishing we could simply turn the anxiety off. The problem is that none of those responses make the anxiety go away, and it often makes it worse. That’s when many people unknowingly find themselves in a fight with their own anxiety

Why Fighting Anxiety Can Make It Feel Worse

Anxiety is hard enough on its own. What often makes it even harder is the fight that begins inside of you once it shows up. Instead of responding with curiosity, we often respond with criticism. We tell ourselves we shouldn’t feel this way, try to force the anxiety to disappear, or become frustrated that we can’t simply “calm down.” Before long, we’re no longer just dealing with anxiety, we’re battling ourselves for having it.

You might notice you’re caught in that fight if your inner dialogue sounds like:

“I should be able to handle this.”
“Why am I always like this?”
“This isn’t even a big deal.”
“I need to stop feeling this way.”

Or maybe it shows up in your actions instead. You avoid making the phone call. You stay inside because going out feels overwhelming. You procrastinate on the task you’ve been thinking about all week. You replay conversations in your head, search for reassurance, or spend hours trying to figure out why you feel this way. It all makes sense: you’re trying to feel better, but that’s why this fight is so exhausting. The more you argue with your anxiety, the more attention you give it. The more attention you give it, the bigger it begins to feel.

Before you know it, you’re no longer just anxious… you’re anxious about being anxious

The Role of Radical Acceptance in Managing Anxiety

One skill that can help you respond differently is radical acceptance.

Radical acceptance means acknowledging what is happening in the present moment without trying to control it. It is the practice of recognizing, “This is what I am feeling right now,” even if you do not like it and want things to be different.

At first, accepting anxiety may sound counterproductive, but noticing what’s happening, giving it a name, deciding not to channel your energy into criticism, or what is out of your control, actually helps you to find the control button in your life.

Radical acceptance says I notice this thing happening to me, and I don’t have to be hard on myself for having this experience. It welcomes the experience as an opportunity for learning or adjustments. It doesn’t mean you agree with the experience, but it allows you to stop creatively running from it.

You might say:

“I feel anxious right now. I do not like this feeling, but I do not have to attack myself for having it.”

That response creates more space than telling yourself: “I cannot feel like this.”

Acceptance Does Not Mean Approval

As we said, accepting your anxiety does not mean that you enjoy it, or want it to remain in a way that continues to interrupt your life. You can accept that you feel anxious and still:

use coping strategies
leave an unhealthy situation
set a boundary
ask for support
book that therapy appointment to address it
work toward reducing your symptoms
make changes in your life

We are simply encouraging you to find your healing and stay in the moment without adding shame, blame, or an internal battle. That typically is what makes the experience of anxiety worse.

Coping Statements for Anxiety

Practicing radical acceptance can look like using coping statements, which help ground you in the present moment and remind you that you are in control and able to handle difficult situations and strong emotions. It won’t magically erase anxiety, but it can help you respond to it with more balance and self-compassion.

You might try:

“This feeling is uncomfortable, but I can get through it.”
“I can feel anxious and still deal with this situation.”
“I do not have to solve everything in this moment.”
“I cannot change what has already happened, but I can choose my next step.”
“Fighting this feeling is making it harder. I can relax and breathe and let it float away without judging myself.”
“I accept this moment as it is.”

Choose one statement that feels believable to you and practice it often. For example, saying, “Everything is fine,” may not help when you do not feel fine. Saying, “I feel overwhelmed, but I can take one small step,” may feel more honest and grounding.

How to Practice Radical Acceptance When Anxiety Shows Up

The next time you notice your anxiety increasing, try pausing before immediately attempting to push it away.

Start by naming what is happening: “My chest feels tight. My thoughts are moving quickly. I am worried that something will go wrong.”

Then separate what you are experiencing from the story your anxiety may be creating: “I am feeling afraid, but that does not automatically mean something bad will happen.”

Next, if you want deeper insights, ask yourself:

What is true in this moment?
What part of this situation can I control?
What am I trying to force or change right now?
What would be a supportive next step?

Your next step may be to take several slow breaths, step outside, write down your thoughts, delay a decision until you feel more grounded, or reach out to someone you trust.

We are not trying to be perfectly calm. Your goal is to bring the feelings down a few degrees and reduce any self-criticism for having a human emotional response. This will create more space for navigating the situation skillfully.

How Anxiety Therapy Can Help

Therapy is a good place to help you put all this together and improve the skills needed to navigate anxiety. It can be difficult to identify your anxiety patterns on your own, or consistently be skillful, especially when they have been present for a long time.

Therapy can help you better understand:

what situations tend to activate your anxiety
how anxiety shows up in your thoughts and body
whether past experiences are influencing current reactions
which coping strategies work best for you
how to respond without becoming overwhelmed by shame or self-criticism

At Kensho Psychotherapy Services in Nassau County, our therapists help clients explore the experiences beneath anxiety while developing practical ways to manage overthinking, physical tension, avoidance, and intense emotions.

Therapy is not only about learning how to calm down. It can also help you understand why certain situations feel so difficult and build a more compassionate, effective relationship with yourself.

Final Thoughts

Nobody enjoys feeling anxious. However, constantly fighting, judging, or criticizing yourself for having anxiety often makes the experience more intense.

Radical acceptance offers a different approach. It allows you to acknowledge what you are feeling without giving the anxiety complete control over what you do next.

You can feel anxious and still take care of yourself. You can feel uncomfortable and still make a thoughtful decision. You can accept what is happening in the present moment while continuing to work toward healing and change.

Kensho Psychotherapy Services offers anxiety therapy and mental health counseling for adults and teens navigating overthinking, stress, trauma, relationship concerns, and longstanding emotional patterns. Our practice is located in Lynbrook, New York, and we offer online therapy to clients throughout New York State if you can’t make it in person.

To learn more about anxiety therapy or schedule a consultation with Kensho Psychotherapy Services, click Book Appointment.

This piece was written with the help of Mental Health Intern Illiana Townsend, who is passionate about helping others better understand anxiety and develop healthier ways of responding to it.

If you or someone you know is experiencing a mental health crisis, call or text 988 to reach the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline. If you believe there is an immediate danger to yourself or someone else, call 911 or go to your nearest emergency department.

Frequently Asked Questions

Does accepting anxiety make it worse?
Accepting anxiety does not mean focusing on it or encouraging it to grow. Radical acceptance can help reduce the additional stress caused by fighting, judging, or fearing the anxiety itself.

Can therapy help me understand what triggers my anxiety?
Yes. Therapy can help you identify situations, thoughts, body sensations, and past experiences that may contribute to anxiety. A therapist can also help you develop coping strategies that fit how anxiety specifically shows up in your life.

Do you accept insurance for therapy?

Yes. Kensho Psychotherapy Services accepts several insurance for therapy, including Aetna, 1199SEIU, Oxford, UnitedHealthcare (UHC), Cigna, Northwell Direct, and Lyra EAP. We also welcome private-pay (self-pay) clients.

If you’re unsure whether your insurance is accepted or have questions about using your benefits, we’d be happy to help you understand your options before scheduling your first appointment. Contact us at 347-868-7813 or click HERE, and we’ll guide you through the process.

EMDR Therapy Therapy Black Therapist in NYC • Black Women & Mental Health • EMDR Therapy • overthinking • Therapy for Anxiety • trauma therapy April 1, 2026 By AMANDA FLUDD 0 Comments

Why Old Wounds Still Hurt (Even When You Thought You Moved On)

Life spoiler alert.

You can be doing well in your life—career, family, responsibilities—and still find yourself reacting in ways that don’t make sense… aka, acting an emotional fool.

You get triggered.
And suddenly it feels big, emotional, and hard to control, like the world has wronged you, or you’re the one in the wrong and now don’t deserve the best out of life.

It’s like a full throwback moment—everything activating at once like Captain Planet and the Planeteers.
Your thoughts, emotions, old beliefs, overwhelm… all combining like:

“By your powers combined… we are your childhood wounds.”

All of that… from one moment.

Not because what just happened was that serious…
But because something deeper got activated.

When It’s Not Just About What Happened

Here’s what most people don’t realize:

When you’re triggered, you’re not just reacting to what’s happening in that moment; instead, it could be that your mind is reaching for the difficult things you carry that no one sees, but your brain still remembers.

Your reactions have deep stories.

Something in the moment feels familiar, like the tone of a supervisor, the judgmental look of your partner, the way someone responded, or even the feeling of being dismissed. And before you can catch what is happening, your nervous system connects to those older experiences, and unexpected things resurface.

It’s subtle, but powerful.

All of a sudden, it’s not just about the conversation you’re having. It starts to feel like something bigger is at stake. Like you’re not safe. Like you’re about to be embarrassed. Like you’re not enough, your needs don’t matter, or you don’t belong.

And that’s the part that catches people off guard.

Because on the outside, the moment might seem small. But internally, your body is responding to something that feels much more significant. Your brain is pulling from a stored memory—not just the present moment.

That’s a trauma response, friends, and it’s happening more than you realize. That’s why your reaction can feel so strong, so fast, and sometimes even confusing.

How Most People Handle Triggers

Most people fall into one of two patterns:

1. Avoidance

“I don’t want to go there.”
“I’m not dealing with that.”

You avoid the conversation, the feeling, or the person. Sometimes you may even freeze, where you lose your thoughts or words, disconnect from the moment and hardly feel present in your body, or get so overwhelmed with panic, you can’t show up the way you want.

And honestly—this makes sense, because triggers are uncomfortable. However, when you avoid the trigger, you also avoid the healing connected to it.

2. Confronting (but without support)

Some people say:

“I’m ready. I just need to deal with it.”

And that matters.

But going back alone can feel overwhelming or lead to reliving the experience rather than resolving it. You really need a good set of resources to help you emotionally and with the logistics of resolution.

Why You Go From 0 to 100 So Fast

This is the part that’s hard to understand.

Why do I feel like this?
Why did I react like that?
This wasn’t even that serious.
Why can’t I handle this better?

It’s the moment panic creeps in before a meeting.
When it suddenly feels like people are against you.
When you look up and realize it’s been years since you’ve moved toward what you actually want.

And you can’t quite explain how you got there.

Your body responded. Quickly. Quietly. Automatically.

But it wasn’t random.
It was your system pulling from something deeper—an older imprint, a familiar feeling, a moment your body hasn’t fully let go of yet.

So no, you’re not doing too much. You’re responding to more than what’s visible. And when you begin to understand that, something shifts. The question moves from “What’s wrong with me?” to “What is this connected to?” That’s where healing begins. That’s where you start showing up not just as the version of you that copes, but as the version of you that feels grounded, clear, and fully in control of herself again.

Why EMDR Therapy Can Help

And this is the work.

Not just understanding yourself, but actually having the space and support to work through what’s underneath those reactions so they don’t keep showing up the same way.

Because insight alone doesn’t always change the response. You can know exactly why you feel the way you do and still find yourself reacting the same way in the moment.

EMDR therapy helps your brain process what’s been stored, so those triggers don’t hit as hard or take over as quickly. You’re not just talking about it. You’re actually helping your system understand and release it. This is the freedom so many of our clients experience.

When you begin to answer that deeper question, things don’t land the same. You feel more grounded, confident, clear, and more like yourself again.

If you’re ready for that kind of work, we’d love to support you.

Work With Us – Kensho Psychotherapy (Lynbrook, NY)

At Kensho Psychotherapy, we specialize in working with high-functioning adults who feel:

Stuck in overthinking
Emotionally overwhelmed
Reactive in ways they don’t fully understand

We offer:

📍 Located in Lynbrook, NY
💻 Virtual therapy available across New York State

We currently have in-person and virtual therapy openings available.

If you’re ready to stop managing the same patterns and actually work through them, you can reach out to get started.

Common Questions

Who is EMDR therapy for?

EMDR is helpful for individuals dealing with anxiety, trauma, overthinking, self-sabotage, perfectionism, emotional triggers, and patterns that feel hard to break—even when you understand them logically.

Do you offer regular therapy or only intensives?

At Kensho Psychotherapy, we offer both. Many clients work with us for anxiety, stress, relationship challenges, and life transitions through ongoing therapy or choose intensives for more focused work. EMDR is where healing can happen in a shorter period of time.

Do you only work with women?

We primarily work with high-functioning women—especially Black and Brown professionals—but we also see men, couples, and some teens and young adults navigating anxiety, identity, and life in the practice. It’s best to give us a call, and we can discuss your situation and best fit.

Where are you located?

We are based in Lynbrook, NY, and serve clients across Nassau County, Valley Stream, and nearby NYC. We also offer virtual therapy throughout New York State.

Do you accept insurance?

Kensho Psychotherapy accepts insurance for ongoing therapy, including plans such as Aetna, 1199, Northwell Direct, Oxford, UHC, Optum, Cigna, and Lyra. We also work with clients who choose to pay privately.

EMDR intensives are not covered by insurance due to the specialized format and extended session times. These sessions are designed to go deeper in a shorter period of time and are offered as a private pay service.

Current EMDR Intensive rates:

$300 for 90 minutes
$600 for 3 hours
$1200 for 6 hours or a full-day intensive

If you’re unsure what makes the most sense for you, we’re happy to walk you through your options when you reach out.

Want to Learn More First?

If you’d rather understand how EMDR Intensives work before reaching out, you can watch the full video where I break this down in more detail.

👉 What Happens When Your Past Has A Grip On Your Present

If you are ready to book a therapy appointment, just leave your details HERE.

Amanda Fludd is a licensed trauma therapist, executive coach, and the founder of Kensho Psychotherapy in Lynbrook, NY, where she works with high-functioning women navigating anxiety, overthinking, and emotional overwhelm. Her work blends trauma-informed therapy with practical, real-life insight to help clients move beyond coping and into clarity.

She offers EMDR intensives through Kensho Psychotherapy, while her team also provides ongoing therapy for anxiety, stress, relationships, and life transitions.

Book now!!

Black and white pen-and-ink illustration of a young girl with braids and backpack standing beside her older self with an afro, hoop earrings, and a structured handbag, alongside the quote: “Sometimes trauma isn’t what happened to you. It’s what you had to become to survive it.” Symbolizing high functioning trauma. Kenshopsychotherapy Psychotherapy.

Anxiety Therapy Trauma Healing • Therapy February 20, 2026 By AMANDA FLUDD 0 Comments

Trauma & Anxiety Therapy in Lynbrook, NY | Kensho Psychotherapy

Trauma & Anxiety Therapy For the Strong Ones

If you are the strong one—the capable one—the one everyone leans on—you may not look like someone who needs therapy.

You’re accomplished. Responsible. Often the firstborn. Often the dependable one. You push through. You pray through. You handle things.

But inside, your thoughts don’t slow down.

At Kensho Psychotherapy Services in Lynbrook, NY, we specialize in trauma and anxiety therapy for high-functioning women and professionals across Nassau County, Valley Stream, and neighboring Queens communities. Many of our clients are Afro-Caribbean, first-generation, or raised in families where strength was expected, and emotional needs were secondary.

For Ambitious Women Who Carry Too Much

Most of the women who thrive in our space are in their late 30s, 40s, or approaching another milestone year, and often mid- to high-level professionals. Some are parents. Some are preparing to become parents. Many are navigating career growth, leadership roles, family expectations, their personal goals, quiet worries, fading dreams, and familial responsibilities simultaneously.

From the outside, everything looks so good.

But for most, inside feels heavy.

You may feel pressure to be grateful because you’ve achieved so much. You may have grown up hearing messages like:

“Push through.”
“Pray through.”
“You should be fine.”
“You have so much going for you.”

But strength without space to process becomes exhaustion.

Anxiety becomes the language your body uses when unprocessed grief, disappointment, responsibility, or old wounds don’t have anywhere to go.

When Anxiety Is More Than Just Overthinking

Many clients come to us thinking they just have anxiety.

They describe:

Constant overthinking
Racing thoughts
Difficulty sleeping
Panic in high-stakes moments
Feeling like they can’t relax even when nothing is wrong

As we begin therapy, we often uncover deeper layers.

Anxiety sometimes connects to:

Childhood pressure to perform
Being the firstborn who had to “get it right,” or “do all the things.”
Emotional invalidation
Unspoken family expectations
Experiences of not being defended
Sacrifices that were never acknowledged

What first looked like anxiety may include trauma, grief, or long-standing emotional patterns. And baybe, we are here for all of it!

Trauma That Doesn’t Always Look Like Trauma

Not all trauma is dramatic.

Sometimes it is:

The disappointment you swallowed
The expectations that shaped your identity
The grief you never processed
The loss of who you were before responsibility took over

At Kensho Psychotherapy, we create a safe space for those layers to unfold. We use evidence-based approaches, including EMDR and cognitive therapy, or somatic work and mindfulness when appropriate, to help work through trauma without re-traumatizing you.

We move at your pace. We just bring the tools to do the heavy lifting.

Therapy That Is Warm, Direct, and Grounded in the Craft

We are not a factory-style clinic. We are also not performative “Instagram therapy.”

Our therapists are seasoned, culturally attuned women—many with Afro-Caribbean backgrounds—who value the craft of therapy.

What that means for you:

Warmth without coddling
We can kick it, but you will give you homework
Depth without theatrics
Structure without rigidity
Professionalism and a deep respect for confidentiality

We take time to understand your full story. We help you organize your thoughts. We reflect patterns you may not see. We slow things down so you can hear yourself clearly and bring in the tools to help you do the work and heal faster.

Serving Lynbrook, Valley Stream, Nassau County & Nearby Queens

Our office is located in Lynbrook, NY, and we serve clients throughout Nassau County, including Valley Stream, as well as nearby Queens neighborhoods such as Cambria Heights and Rosedale. But since we also offer virtual therapy, we can support clients across New York State, like Brooklyn and beyond.

If you have been searching for:

Trauma therapy in Lynbrook
Anxiety therapy in Valley Stream
EMDR therapy in Nassau County
Black therapist or Caribbean therapist in NY
Culturally competent therapy near Queens

You are in the right place.

What to Expect When You Reach Out

You can call our office or complete the consultation request form online. We will contact you to:

Review your insurance and discuss deductibles or out-of-network options
Answer your initial questions
Help you determine if we are the right fit

We want you to have your questions answered before committing to therapy.

Ready to Begin?

If you are tired of holding everything together…

If anxiety is louder than it used to be…

If old experiences are starting to surface…

Trauma and anxiety therapy at Kensho Psychotherapy Services in Lynbrook can help you untangle what feels overwhelming and reconnect with who you are beneath the pressure.

We currently have limited in-person openings in Lynbrook and virtual availability across New York.

👉 Book a consultation or contact our office today at 347-868-7813.