Tag: <span>healing trauma</span>

The Silent Pandemic

We are resilient people. Our minds, however, were not designed to handle this level of direct exposure to trauma. From our medical and mental health workers with first hand visuals of the brutally of Covid-19, to the rest of society inundated with daily updates meant to inform us, yet simultaneously engaging us in the narrative of secondary trauma.  By bearing witness to the magnitude of loss and uncertainty, we become living fatalities of trauma.

There is no way we can ingest over 6,500 people losing their lives in New York City, all the while still adapting to the consequences of this illness- from loss of income, to adjusting to life at home, to a virtual way of existing, and claim to be ok. Without question, we are not ok.

The secret toll of this pandemic is the one that’s brewing in our minds with each passing day that we shelter in place, or go out to work as an essential worker.  The depth of what that means I had a chance to discuss with several professionals in the field and they all agree we are all in response mode, but slowly unraveling.  However, here is what to look for and what to do.

The signs of traumatic stress:

  • Changes in sleep including difficulty falling asleep or staying asleep
  • Increased irritability and arguments
  • Fear you can’t shake
  • Physical ailments like headaches or stomach aches, or tightness in the chest or arm that last a few days
  • Decreased motivation
  • Increased anxiety and worry

 

According to Charles Darwin it is not the strongest of the species that survives, nor the most intelligent that survives. It is the one that is most adaptable to change. To increase your resiliency these experts suggested:

  • Pause and check in with yourself. What is your body saying to you?  What do you need right now? Nurture that.
  • Maintain a routine to keep your mind and body active and stimulated.
  • Acknowledge when you don’t feel your best, or when it’s hard or that you are just overwhelmed. The truth is, this is all out of our control and you are not alone in how you feel.
  • Do whatever action you can to foster a sense of empowerment. What can you control? What can you do?
  • Disconnect from social media and even from your family or friends. Create a sacred space to de-stress and inforce boundaries where needed.
  • Know its ok to cry and take the pressure off.
  • Build pause and self-care in every day.

An important resource is also any option to talk about your experiences and get some support. Therapy is a wonderful resources and if you need help finding a therapist reach out to us at 347-868-7813.  The Office of Mental Health also offer a free and confidential support line: 1844-863-9314. Now is a great time to boost your mental health and you don’t have to do that alone with fantastic telehealth options available. For more great insights and tips catch the full episode at www.facebook.com/therapyisdope or watch it here.

 

Amanda Fludd, LCSW-R

 

Sometimes I Sit and Wish I Was A Kid Again

Feelings of nostalgia are common when remembering the care-free days of childhood, when we couldn’t wait to grow up. Those were idle moments, when our spirits were light and the possibilities were endless before trading in books in our backpacks for responsibility.

Our imaginations knew no bounds- we were pirates who conquered the sea, or scared but brave kids who went past the invented line down the block that your parents told you not to cross. As kids, we had incredible capacity to dream and create before we grew up and the world dictated how our stories should go.

If your imagination were a muscle, would you say that it grew with over time or has it become weaker over time? The sad truth is that, as we grow up, the world places more emphasis on reality and because of that our creative power diminishes and we become slaves to routine and the norm. Ever wonder how we might get back to that place of freedom and wide-open curiosity? Is it even possible to reconnect with our inner child in order to repair the damage that societal pressures have caused? Absolutely! We can strengthen that muscle that has weakened over time.

By tapping back into our own originality, creative visualization, and spending time in free-spirited play, and embracing all that is possible in this moment right now, it is possible to once again view the world (and ourselves) as we did when we were kids.

Buckle up! The Way to Rekindle Your Relationship with Your Inner Child Is About to Be Revealed …

1. Drop the leather brief case and go play – go for a bike ride, escape around the block before your kids notice, or take 5 minutes on a swing set. Photo by Malcolm Garretfrom @malcolmgaret

Photo by Malcolm Garret from Pexels

2. Train that imagination muscle – make time to think of scenarios outside of reality that bring you joy. Write down what your dream life looks like.  Have fun envisioning a lifestyle that appears impossible to achieve in as much color and description as you can and put it up somewhere you can see it.

3. Get creative – color a picture, throw some paint on a blank canvas, mash up some playdough…anything that has minimal rules involved and will give you a feeling of freedom.

4. Ask yourself – what brings me joy? Sit for a moment and plot out a list of things that you like to do regularly and would like to do if you had more time. Maybe it’s going for a walk, cooking, hot yoga, horseback riding, karaoke, playing an instrument, window shopping, or checking out a Broadway play. Collect a list of your toys and then schedule a play date with yourself!

5. Borrow a kid– If you have access to your own kids, or maybe can borrow one, like your niece or godchildren, put down your phone and join them in what they love to do. Ask them why they love it and play without judgment in their space if even just for 20 minutes and see what magic happens for them and you. If you don’t have access to a kid, then who else can you recruit as a partner in crime? 

Charles Bukowski once said, “Can you remember who you were, before the world told you who you should be?”

Taking time out of our lives to reconnect with our inner child gives us room to strengthen our sense of self.  Not only does it crack the door to self-discovery, but it totally kicks it in and demolishes all the walls that were around it (walls created by ourselves and our perceptions of what the world wants us to be). Learning how to be a kid again is the ticket to remembering our authentic selves and allows us to gift our uniqueness and originality back to the world.

Amanda Fludd, LCSW-R @Kensho Psychotherapy #Therapyisdope

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