Tag: <span>Parenting</span>

A Child's Love Language

The Five Love Languages: Kids Edition!

A Child's Love Language
Do You Know Your Child’s Love Language?

Discussions around the five love languages have become a staple in the marriage and dating world. Love languages are ways of expressing and receiving love that can help couples better understand how to communicate with their partners. The idea around love languages is that it is essential to learn your partner’s love language and show them love in that way (and vice versa!). This means, if someone feels the most loved by spending quality time with their partner, their partner will make a great effort to prioritize that alone time with them.

What people may not know is that love languages can be applied to their children. Just like adults, children have their own personalities and ways in which they express and feel love. Today let’s discuss how the five love languages can be applied to parent-child relationships and how parents can match them.

The Love Languages and How to Meet Your Child’s Needs

Physical Touch – If your child loves cuddles, hugs, and holding hands, this may be their love language! Physical touch is an important way for some children to feel connected and receive attention from their parents. Physical touch can include kisses, holding hands, back rubs, special handshakes, or high fives. Some children want to feel close to their parents to feel loved. 

It’s beneficial to use this or other love languages when your child is experiencing difficult emotions like sadness, anger, grief, pain, or confusion.  

Children Affirmations
Affirming Your Child is An Act of Love

Words of Affirmation – Some children thrive from hearing their parents affirm and acknowledge how much they love them and are proud of their achievements. You can verbally tell your child, “Mommy loves you!” or “You did so well on your test; I’m so proud of all the work you put in to study.” Additionally, you can leave handwritten notes to your child as an extra special touch. 

Gifts – Have you ever seen your child’s face light up when they receive a gift and squeal while saying, “this is just what I wanted. You love me!” Has your child ever seemingly randomly given you a special gift or drawing? Giving and receiving gifts maybe your child’s love language. 

The significance of the gift is less about size or monetary value but rather about the meaningfulness of the gift and knowing their parent is thinking of them.

You may be thinking, which kid doesn’t like gifts?!

Very true! However, a child with this love language will have a much stronger reaction to receiving gifts than other children would.

Quality Time – This love language is indicative of your child wanting to spend uninterrupted time with you and bask in your attention. If you see that your child wants to be near you and seeks out more togetherness time, this may 

be their love language. It is incredibly beneficial to children’s overall development to have quality time and attention with their parents.

You can spend time together watching their favorite show, playing their favorite game (even if you are clueless about what is happening) or preparing a meal together, getting outside for a walk, or spend time reading stories before bed or talking about your life stories for the too grown teenage crowd.  

Acts of Service – If this is your child’s love language, they may ask for help doing things like tying their shoes, organizing their rooms, or putting together winter kits for strangers. It may seem like a simple request, but they still need your support. These selfless or engaging acts may indicate that an act of service will help them know how supportive you are.

No matter what your child’s love language is, it is crucial to take the time to learn it and express your love through their language versus your own. For example, if you thrive off physical touch but your child always pulls away, try respecting that boundary, and looking for ways to connect with them in their own love language. Of course, because they are children, there may need to be limits set on the languages. After all, you may not always be able to offer them exactly what they want at every moment. Parenting is all about balance and flexibility!

For guidance on how to nurture your family relationships or support your child’s emotional wellbeing, you can inquire about family or individual therapy here.


Written by Alyssa Heavens, MFT Intern and edited by Amanda Fludd, LCSW-R, Psychotherapist, Clinical Supervisor & Mental Health Consultant 

Not My Circus: How To Support Remote Work Parents

Leading your remote work(ing parent) team


Supporting Remote Working Parents

It appears our conversation will not be changing for quite some time. COVID-19 will forever be in our vocabularies. For working parents it put a full stop on stability as the school year frantically ended forcing major adjustments to accommodate work and our remote families. Just as we settled into that rhythm, summer came to a screeching halt and it’s time to get back to school across the country and every region seems to have a different plan. Parents are now back to the circus, forcing them to flex their juggling skills while putting strain on the ring master, work.

One thing that is universal for all parents working remotely is that balance is the key to success. In speaking with several parents, their collective concern is the impact of this sudden change in structure on their children, and what it means for their emotional and academic well-being. They also expressed concern with their own job stability, stress levels and productivity. For their kids, they are grappling with missing their friends, lost attention from teachers in the classroom, organized sports, yearly milestones like prom, social learning opportunities, widening education gaps and a reason to get out of their pajamas in the morning.

While there are no easy answers to the side effects to this pandemic, here is how to support your child and family while working from home:

  1. Check in with your child regularly. Ask them how they are doing and what they are struggling with when it comes to staying home or returning to school.
  2. Filter media exposure, especially for young children. Have discussions about key issues at age appropriate levels.
  3. Maintain social connections even while social distancing. Children are the most resilient when embedded in a network of social supports: a relative, a caring parent figure, teacher, etc.
  4. Seize the opportunity and make an effort to eat lunch or dinner together often as a family.

    Given some basic support and protection, our children have remarkable strength and hardiness.
  5. Get out and get active. You or your child may be struggling with anxiety and stress, which can affect memory, attention, and mood. Movement naturally helps us regulate our mood.
  6. Let’s face it, school was an escape for all of us. Make sure that everyone has the necessary time to disconnect and have alone time.  For stressed parents caring for children and trying to work: Put on your own oxygen mask first. Your self-care is essential. Being intentional with your own needs is vital to you, your children and your work.

How can employers support parents that have to work remotely  while still maintaining their work responsibilities?

We all struggle with work life balance, and just like children need frequent communication, flexibility and support, so do remote work parents! During this pandemic it is important that employers show extra care and patience for their very human employees as they try to navigate the right balance for themselves. For front line managers and administrators this may look like:

  1. Frequent check in’s and providing employees a safe space to offer feedback. This is key for leaders to get a clear understanding of what employees actually need and to demonstrate a culture of empathy and concern.
  2. Allowing employees to schedule around their children’s school schedule  (or offering  remote  work  options  and  flexible  schedules  for  the  entire  team).
  3. Being lenient with children walking across the screen or yelling to mom or dad for help during that 11am critical meeting.
  4. Acknowledging the tremendous strain of being present for work and your child.
  5. Implementing mental wellness opportunities and resources onsite or virtually to support the resilience of your remote team. Worker bees with tools to manage stress and overwhelm are more likely to exhibit resilience in the workplace and hit productivity goals.
  6. That said, modify your expectations.

The latest assumption that was communicated by Dr. Fauci is that we will not have a good handle on this pandemic until the end of 2021, so in other words, we are in this for a while.  Now is the time for all of us to show a lot more patience and understanding because this impacts all of us. We all have key roles and responsibilities in the well-being of our greatest assets.


Free Resources for Kids + Adults

Check out the following free resources to support your school and work efforts at home.

Khan Academy: Free resources for parents, families, and educators including daily schedule templates for different ages and grades.

Cosmic Kids Yoga: Fun videos on mindfulness, yoga, and relaxation for kids

Free Wi-Fi with Comcast: Struggling to access school or work remotely? Comcast announced it will offer free wi-fi hotspots around the country, plus other accommodations and discounts for low-income families. Check out their service page for more information.

Need tips from teachers at home? Parents can get insight straight from the professionals with curated resources such as webinars on remote instruction and practical advice.

Free Live & Online – Daily Meditation & Support Groups from Mindful Leader: Thirty-minute sessions held Monday through Friday from March 23 to May 1, including 15 minutes of silent meditation and 15 minutes of reflection and discussion.

Anxiety and stress: If its impacting your sleep and ability to focus and complete tasks, check out our psychotherapy services. 

For more information on how to promote work and life balance, reduce stress and support the mental well being of your team, connect with us.


Amanda Fludd, LCSW-R is a passionate advocate for positive workplace culture, ambitious mindsets and mental health. Her programs focus on trauma, depression and anxiety, both on the couch and in the workplace.

psychotherapy, connections, healing, emotional recovery

The Power of Falling: How Embracing Setbacks Fuel Emotional Healing and Connections

Explore the journey of emotional healing and authentic connection in this blog. We tackle the challenges of self-criticism …

woman dealing with disappointment

How Does Disappointment Impact You Emotionally? 

Dive into our latest blog where we tackle the real deal – handling disappointment like a pro. Life’s got its twists, …

permission for self care, to unplug and redefine mental health

Redefining Mental Health

Redefining Mental Health is understanding the complexities of mental health, recognizing whats in our control and learning …